The Art of Networking
Networking. Just the word can make some of us break out in a cold sweat. For years, I thought it was all about collecting as many LinkedIn contacts and business cards as humanly possible, like some twisted scavenger hunt. But I’ve since learned that real networking—the kind that actually changes your life and your career—isn’t about quantity. It’s about quality.
If you’ve ever struggled with feeling awkward at events or wondered how to turn a casual coffee chat into a meaningful connection, you’re not alone. Networking is a skill, and like any skill, it takes practice and intentionality. Let me share how I’ve come to embrace networking as a way to build relationships that matter, not just for my career but for my personal growth as well.
The Shift From Collecting to Connecting
When I first started attending networking events, I approached them like a competition: How many people could I talk to? How many cards could I walk away with? Spoiler alert: This strategy didn’t work. I ended up with a stack of cards and zero genuine connections.
One day, it hit me—networking isn’t about “getting.” It’s about “giving.” It’s about being curious, finding common ground, and showing up as a real human being. That shift in mindset changed everything for me. Instead of worrying about what others could do for me, I started focusing on how I could add value to them.
Preparing to Network: Know Your Story
Networking doesn’t start when you walk into a room; it starts before. Whether you’re heading to a conference or joining a virtual meeting, preparation is key.
For me, that means knowing my story. Who am I? What do I do? What am I passionate about? When you can articulate these things clearly, it’s much easier to connect with others.
💡 Pro Tip: Practice your personal pitch, but keep it conversational. For example, instead of saying, “I’m a project manager specializing in workflow optimization,” I might say, “I help teams work smarter by figuring out how to streamline their processes.” It’s less robotic and invites curiosity.
Making the First Move (Without Feeling Awkward)
Walking up to someone you don’t know can feel intimidating. Trust me, I’ve been there. But here’s a little secret: Most people feel the same way. They’re just waiting for someone (like you!) to break the ice.
My go-to strategy is to ask open-ended questions.
- “What brought you to this event?”
- “What’s the most exciting project you’re working on right now?”
- “How did you get into your field?”
These questions do two things: They shift the focus away from you (hooray for introverts!) and show genuine interest in the other person.
The Power of Active Listening
One of the best compliments I’ve ever received at a networking event was, “Wow, you’re such a good listener.” At the time, I thought, Isn’t that what everyone does? Apparently not.
Here’s the thing: Most people don’t listen to understand; they listen to respond. Active listening means giving someone your full attention—no checking your phone, no scanning the room for someone more “important.” It means asking thoughtful follow-up questions and repeating back what you’ve heard to show you’re engaged.
💡 Example: If someone mentions they’re launching a new app, you could say, “That’s amazing! What inspired the idea?” rather than jumping in with your own story about that one time you thought about making an app.
Virtual Networking: Yes, It’s Possible
In today’s world, networking isn’t limited to conference halls and coffee shops. Virtual networking is just as powerful—if not more so, because it removes geographical barriers.
When I network online, I treat it the same way I would an in-person event. Whether it’s a Zoom meeting or a LinkedIn message, I aim to be authentic and specific. Instead of sending a generic “Let’s connect” message, I’ll say something like:
“Hi [Name], I loved your recent post about [topic]. It really resonated with me because [specific reason]. I’d love to connect and learn more about your work.”
This approach shows that you’re not just hitting “connect” for the sake of it. You’re genuinely interested in the person.
Turning One-Off Chats Into Lasting Relationships
Here’s where most people drop the ball: follow-up. A quick conversation at an event or a virtual intro is just the beginning. The magic happens when you nurture the connection.
After meeting someone, I make it a habit to send a personalized follow-up message within 24 hours. Something simple like:
“Hi [Name], it was such a pleasure chatting with you at [event]. I really enjoyed hearing about [specific topic]. Let’s stay in touch—I’d love to continue the conversation!”
From there, I look for ways to keep the relationship alive. That might mean sharing an article they’d find interesting, inviting them to another event, or simply checking in every few months. Relationships take time to grow, but they’re worth the effort.
Overcoming Networking Anxiety
If networking feels daunting, start small. Your goal isn’t to “win” the event or meet every single person in the room. It’s to have one or two meaningful conversations.
When I’m feeling particularly anxious, I remind myself of this mantra: Networking is just a conversation. It’s not an interview or a sales pitch. It’s two people connecting over shared interests and experiences.
💡 Pro Tip: If you’re attending a big event, set a small, achievable goal. For example, “I’m going to introduce myself to three people.” That’s it.
Networking as a Long Game
Here’s the truth: Networking doesn’t pay off overnight. It’s not about instant gratification; it’s about planting seeds. Some of the most valuable connections I’ve made took months—or even years—to develop into opportunities.
Remember, people want to work with, recommend, and collaborate with those they know, like, and trust. Building that trust takes time. Be patient, be consistent, and most importantly, be yourself.
From Awkward to Authentic
Networking isn’t about being the most outgoing person in the room or having the perfect elevator pitch. It’s about showing up with curiosity, authenticity, and a willingness to connect.
So the next time you walk into a networking event or hop on a Zoom call, take a deep breath. Start with one conversation. Ask questions. Listen intently. And remember: It’s not about how many contacts you collect; it’s about the relationships you build.
Who knows? The person you connect with today could become your mentor, collaborator, or lifelong friend tomorrow.
Here’s to networking—done the meaningful way!
Glow & Grow 
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